In no way do I wish to down play anyone's relationship with Daniel. I wish I had the words to tell you all exactly how he felt about you...so the world could see. I do believe that most everyone in Daniel's life knew in their hearts how he felt about them. Tonight I want to share with you the special relationship he had with Derek, his step father.
Derek came into Daniel's life when he was a wee one of 31/2. He was a little handful, our Daniel was. Full of life and sass. He was so very fortunate to have many positive male role models in his life. One of which was Derek. Derek and I were married in 1995 and started our own family with the birth of Joel, and later Lainey. Derek accepted Daniel as a son from the moment we knew we were going to create our little family. Derek always knew that we (Daniel and I) were a package deal. Derek never for one minute had any intention of being anything but a provider for Daniel and an influence that would remain positive to the very last goodbye that they had before Daniel left for Victoria. The desire of Derek's heart was not to intrude on Steven's relationship with Daniel, but rather, just be there for this little boy, all the while, loving his mother. Steven and Derek were always amicable with each other, both knowing that Daniel had enough love for them both. Derek loved Daniel. Derek's entire FAMILY loved Daniel. There was never any more love for Joel or Lainey in comparison. The love was equal and very deep.
Daniel looked up to Derek for many of his traits. He was a good provider. He put a roof over our heads, food in our bellies, we had a little family. Even when things didn't work out with Derek and I, Daniel and Derek remained close. He went for visits when Joel and Lainey did. Every time. They stayed close, shared holidays and memories that were both very special to the two of them.
The reason I felt moved to share this with everyone was, that being a step father is not always the easiest job. But Derek made it look easy. When Daniel and Derek's relationship began to blossom it was just at the time that Daniel lost his brother. Derek knew the importance of NOT replacing Steven, just adding love and support to Daniel's already complicated-by-grief life.
I know that I also speak for Steven when I say that we are thankful that Derek was in Daniel's life. We both love that Derek loved him. And we are very aware that this tragedy has left a huge hole in Derek's heart. Derek doesn't say much. He is quiet and gentle soul that doesn't desire the limelight in any way. But I think it is time that I say out loud, for all to hear .... Thank you Derek Robert Thur, for loving my boy with all your heart. Thank you Oma and Opa. Thank you Auntie Elly, Uncle Morris, Robyn, Mark and Jillian. Thank you Uncle Hans and Auntie Lisa, Heather, Michael and Krista. Thank you Uncle Richard, Auntie Jennifer, Chelsea, Brennen and Joshua Joel. Thank you for loving Daniel. He loved you all very much. You are his family too xoxo
Lisa (Daniel's Step mom); Thank you for loving Daniel. It has never been lost on me how much you cared for him. You cooked for him, you put weight on him and most importantly... you love his father. That is the greatest gift you ever gave Daniel, besides the love for him. I wish I could tell your story with Daniel better, but I feel so thankful. You made him feel safe. You didn't "over mother" him (I did). He could tell you things that he couldn't tell Steven and I. And that is huge. I do know that your family loved him too. He was always so proud to call all your nieces and nephews his cousins. He loved you very much. He knew you loved him. And he treasured the times he spent with you. Thank you for loving his Dad. Daniel was so handsome at your wedding, I know it was no question to have him involved, but he was so proud. He always told me. Thank you for continuing to love his Dad...I know Daniel can rest easy knowing that you are there to comfort Steven and care for him. I will be eternally grateful for the kindness and love that you showed our boy. Thank you from the bottom of my broken little heart xoxo
As sappy and heartfelt as this was to write, I have felt it needed to be said for sometime. Daniel's family was big, loving, and important to him. From the start with the Chapples and the Levesques, soon adding the Channells, and the Thurs....and all the others in between.
One of the very last texts I got from Daniel, on the day that he died he said
"Mum,I know that I am a blessed boy"
He knew. He had so much love to give, and he was equally as easy to love.
I miss my son, My heart is broken
Stacey
